By April Son
In Myanmar society, there is a distinctive way of social interaction in which people speak and behave with consideration for one another’s feelings and circumstances. This kind of behaviour is one of the admirable qualities of the Myanmar people, who show respect to those who are older, courtesy to their peers, and kindness and compassion towards those who are younger.
In interacting and communicating with one another, people are expected to base their conduct on an understanding of the three conditions. Since these three conditions are expressed in Pali, it is evident that they are derived from the teachings of Buddhism. Therefore, when associating not only with individuals but also with groups, a person should be guided by the principles of Mukha Chāyā, Vacana Chāyā, and Kāla Chāyā.
Mukha Chāyā
Mukha in Pali means face, and Chāyā is defined as the shade or shadow. As such, Mukha Sāyā refers to the principle that, in dealing with others, a person should observe another person’s facial expressions and demeanor before interacting with or speaking to them. Whenever speaking or acting, one should be able to gauge the other person’s mood and reactions rather than simply saying whatever one wishes.
Before expressing one’s thoughts, one should consider whether the other person is interested in listening or whether the conversation might upset or offend them. By carefully assessing the other person’s state of mind, one should speak only as much as is appropriate.
On the other hand, speaking insistently without regard for the other person’s feelings or circumstances not only fails to persuade or engage them but can also become tiresome and irritating. If taken too far, it may even provoke anger. Persisting in speaking when the other person has no desire to listen can leave them feeling frustrated, annoyed, or even contemptuous towards the speaker.
Vacana Chāyā
Vacana in Pali is defined as utterance, word, saying, a term, and an expression. Hence, the second principle called Vacana Chāyā can be described as follows: in any conversation between two people, one should listen attentively to what the other person is saying. By giving careful attention, the other person will feel satisfied and develop a favourable impression of you.
Moreover, attentive listening enables you to understand the other person’s views clearly. It also helps you discern whether they are speaking sarcastically, offering praise, or speaking in an impatient tone. By carefully observing the manner and tone of the other person’s speech, you should exercise sound judgment and mindfulness in deciding how to respond appropriately.
By listening to what the other person says, you can gain the information and insights you need. Listening carefully also allows you to prepare an appropriate response in return.
In reality, everyone tends to want to take the lead in a conversation and express their own views. People often become upset when they are not given a chance to speak. Therefore, when a person sees that their conversation partner is listening to them with genuine interest, they feel satisfied and tend to view positively whatever the listener says or does. This can become the first step toward building successful relationships and achieving success.
Kāla Chāyā
Kāla means time. The final one is the principle of Kāla Chāyā. Its meaning is that, in order to live and establish oneself successfully in the place where one resides, one should also be able to observe and understand the conditions of the surrounding environment and the appropriate timing.
One should examine whether the place where one is living or working is suitable for the activities one intends to carry out. One should also be able to assess whether the time chosen to undertake a particular task is appropriate and favourable.
In matters such as business, social affairs, and religion, one should carefully consider the circumstances and timing, and be able to make wise decisions on whether a particular action should or should not be taken at a certain time and place. Inappropriate actions should be avoided, while those considered beneficial and necessary should be pursued with determination and effort. Only then can one reduce the number of competitors and adversaries.
Analyze three conditions
When carrying out tasks, one should consider the timing and location and strive to achieve the best possible outcome. To do so, the advantages and disadvantages of the three conditions should be thoroughly analyzed before taking action. Only through such careful consideration can one achieve success with confidence and overcome difficulties.
The main point is that, not only in speaking but in all forms of conduct, communication, and action, one should not focus solely on one’s own wishes and interests. It is important to understand the wishes, perspectives, and actions of others as well, and to allow them to express themselves. If a person speaks only what they want to say without considering anyone else’s feelings, and continues speaking without understanding or appreciating the wishes of others, it will be difficult for them to get along well in society. Whatever one does, success in all aspects can be achieved only by maintaining a fair balance of give-and-take and mutual consideration with others.
If people around you no longer appreciate your behaviour or the way you speak, and they have grown tired of listening to you, the best course of action is to bring it to a close as quickly as possible. If the topic you are talking about is something that everyone already knows well, you should consider whether to present it in a fresh and engaging way or, since it is already familiar to everyone, to keep it brief and conclude it quickly.
We all know, from our own experience, that when someone delivers a long-winded speech, everyone—including ourselves—becomes bored and restless. Knowing this, we should avoid taking too much time when it is our turn to speak. Instead, we should speak concisely and to the point, and include something memorable, humorous, or engaging so that others can listen with interest and enjoyment.
Likewise, when working together with many people to successfully accomplish a task, we must make every effort ourselves to avoid negligence and to maintain a good image and reputation in the eyes of others. If we act with empathy and consideration in all matters, our words, manners, and behaviour within society will become harmonious and balanced with those of others.
In today’s era, people are familiar with the use of modern electronic devices and various internet-based technologies. As they have little time to spend on listening to or observing lengthy communications and activities, they have become accustomed to acting and responding quickly. They also do not have much time to thoroughly study information from the media and various social networking platforms.
Therefore, when presenting news and information, various media outlets have begun to provide concise, clear, and engaging content that meets the preferences of users. In other words, as information is now being presented in a way that appeals to audiences, unnecessary exaggeration, lengthy speeches, and overly elaborate writing should be avoided. Likewise, everyone should pay attention to managing their time efficiently and make every effort to save time in all their activities and daily conduct.
As such, everyone should keep in mind and carefully consider the three points mentioned above in order to ensure that their words, actions, and conduct do not appear inappropriate or unpleasant in the eyes of others. As a result, they will be able to maintain a proper and faultless manner of speaking, living, and working within their social environment.
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